It's 957 on New Year's Eve. I have not been here in several days. Which is bad. I meant to get on here every day and write whatever is on my mind regarding Jae. Jae is off to church and I am home sick. She is in Austin TX (or Round Rock, rather) and I am in Miami. Within three weeks, she will be back in California, and she seems to be very excited about that. While she was down here, I do not believe she knew many people, and from what I can tell, I was the main source of her entertainment. She has stayed in contact with many of her California friends, mind you, she was just there in September and so there is no reason why she should not know or speak to a lot of people. She seems very excited because I believe she has many ties there, again, she just left and is going back to return. I initially thought, and confirmed, she was going back there to deal with her ex boyfriend. She seems to be stuck on him. I believe her when she tells me she is waiting for God to tell her with whom she will be next, but I believe God has already spoken to her and perhaps she has missed it. I could be wrong because I am new to this whole environment. But today she told me she is moving on from him. I believe she means to but I do not think she will. She is still hopeful she and he will get back together. From the person who loves her deeply, I hope she finds happiness with him. From the person who is in love with her, I hope not.
Tonight is New Year's Eve. I hate knowing she is not here and we cannot spend this night togehter. What will God and life bring for both of us? Will we be happy? Will we be happy together? Does she want me? Does she want to be with me? Inquiring minds wanna know.
No comments:
Post a Comment